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An Unexpected Pregnancy Does Not Disqualify Anyone. Just Ask Mary.

By Gayle Fidanzo, Executive Director

Every year we remind each other that Christmas isn’t always jolly for everyone in our community. Despite it being the “Most Wonderful Time of the Year” people are hurting and many find themselves in dire circumstances. Mix in the loss that many experienced in 2020, and that pain is multiplied. So we encourage each other to help whenever and however we can.

This help is especially important, because many of us believe lies about ourselves -- especially when we are down and out. We have a deep-seated feeling that we are not enough and never will be. Psychologists say that we lie to ourselves in 3 major ways, and that all other lies fall into these three categories:

  1. We are unlovable

  2. We are unworthy

  3. We are helpless

Imagine how a woman or a girl with an unexpected pregnancy feels when the people around her are disappointed or, worse, abandon her. She feels unlovable, unworthy and helpless. We wish we could tell every woman struggling with an unwanted or unplanned pregnancy that she has a choice. We want her to know that if she reaches out to Choice Adoptions, we will treat her with love and respect because she is an individual who is worthy of our time and money, and that she is not helpless, but extremely powerful. It is within her power to choose a bright future for herself and her child, whether that is to parent her baby or to find a loving and stable family to raise her child -- a family that will also be eager to embrace a relationship with her.

Dispelling these lies takes the power of community, and that is what we are offering at Choice. We know we are all prone to lie to ourselves, to feel unworthy at times. But the truth is none of us are immune. We all need a little help sometimes. The advocates and staff at Choice Adoptions are not trying to save anyone and we definitely won’t tell anyone what they should decide; but it is our privilege to come alongside and empower young women by offering support and services that can change a dreary Christmas into one filled with hope and promise. And that goes for every day of the year.

Please help us spread the word. We are all intrinsically valuable and created by God for a purpose. An unexpected pregnancy does not disqualify anyone. Just ask Mary, the mother of Baby Jesus.

If you are pregnant and need support, here are pregnancy resources:

How Could Someone Put Their Baby Up for Adoption? (I Could Never Do That!)

What Are the Best Adoption Agencies in Oregon in 2020?

The 9 Things to Know About Adoption In Oregon and Washington


You may also like some of these great adoption resources:

Transracial Adoption Is So Powerful, The Gift Of Openness: Part Two

The Gift of Openness In Adoption: Part One

Why Does Adoption Cost So Much?


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