Common Adoption Myths
“Adoption is giving your baby up.”
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In the past, the birth mother was not in control of what happened to her or the baby. So the term “giving the baby up” was true in those days because others were making the choices for her.
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“I’ll never see my child again.”
In Open Adoption, the birth mother is respected. The child grows up knowing where they came from, reducing the amount of trauma and loss. The amount of contact between the birth and adoptive families can range from visits to joint vacations. ​​​​
“My child will think I abandoned them.”
Modern adoption does not isolate the child from the birth parents. Adoptive children now typically grow up knowing who their birth parents are.​​
“I can only choose a married couple for my baby.”
Adoptions can take place with any sort of family dynamic. That may be a married couple, a single parent, or a family with children. Anyone looking to adopt must go through an extensive process.
Open Adoption
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An open adoption allows for some form of association among the birth parents, adoptive parents and the child they adopted. This can range from picture and letter sharing to phone calls, to contact through an intermediary or open contact among the parties themselves. Many adoptions of older children and teenagers are at least partially open since the children may already know identifying or contact information about members of their birth families, or may want to stay in touch with siblings placed separately.
Closed Adoptions
Closed Adoption – A closed adoption is one where no identifying information about the expectant family or the adoptive family is shared between the two, and there is no contact between the families. The adoptive family will receive non-identifying information about the child and birth family before the baby is born. Closed adoption isn't ideal or necessary for everyone, but we realize that sometimes a closed adoption is the only choice. If you choose to make a closed adoption plan, we will ensure your wishes are met with the upmost understanding and confidentiality.
Adoption and a birth mother
An adoption can give a birth mother an opportunity to fulfill lifelong goals such as college, career, and the chance to parent when the time is right for you. Adoption can offer the opportunity to find a home for your baby that possesses everything you wish to give to them (maybe that is a two parent home, a large yard, siblings, annual vacations, private school, cultural diversity, and more). The expectant parent(s) choose the adoptive family and get to know one another throughout the pregnancy. How much contact you have during the pregnancy and beyond is up to you.
You are in charge.
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Adoption and the baby
If you choose adoption, your child will have the opportunity to live in a stable, loving environment with a family who can provide both emotionally and financially for them at a time in your life when it may not be possible for you to do so.
The child will/can have an extended family to love and nurture your child and provide a safe and secure home and family unit. Your baby will have the chance to receive an education and other opportunities to live a happy and healthy life that may not be an option for you at the moment. An open infant adoption can provide an opportunity for a life full of resources and chances your child may not have received otherwise.
Adoption and the adoptive family
An adoptive family will get to have their dream come true of being able to parent a child. Some families will have the opportunity to raise a child and become parents despite issues of fertility. The adoptive family will be helping a woman with an unplanned pregnancy during a difficult time in her life and make a life-long commitment to love and cherish a baby they could not have on their own.